- 5 -
Không một ai trong đám hầu cận của hoàng phi về của già mệt nhọc có đầu hình chim câu  đứng ở một góc vườn trong ngự sở. những hay bọn đến bên vườn để không phải là chuyện lạ lùng.
Một thị nữ vào bẩm với hoàng phi. Nàng hững hờ nhìn qua bức mành về hướng đó. Dưới bóng những chùm lá non, già trong lớp áo tu đen sờn với dáng ủ rủ. Nhìn một đỗi, hoàng phi người đang đứng đó đúng là vị lão tăng có lần bắt gặp bên bờ hồ Shiga, nàng mới biến sắc.
Sau một lúc chần chờ không biết phải thế nào, nàng ra lệnh cho không làm gì tới người đang đứng trong vườn. Bọn thị nữ , để mặc .
Lòng hoàng phi dậy lên một nỗi . Lần đầu tiên nàng như vậy.
Trong mình, nàng đã từng gặp biết bao người cuộc sống nhưng giáp mặt một người dám những kiếp tương lai. Gặp người đó cũng như thấy một . Điều này khiến nàng đâm ra . Tất cả những khoái cảm nàng tưởng tượng ra khi nghĩ về mối tình của vị lão tăng bỗng tan biến đâu mất. Nếu mối tình ấy đến nỗi cụ dám từ chối và dâng cho nàng tất cả những kiếp về sau thì những kiếp đó cũng không thể lọt vào tay nàng mà không tì vết.
Bà phi ngắm nghía y trang hoa lệ và hai bàn tay của mình rồi nhìn trong manh áo sờn rách đang đứng bên một góc vườn. được hai thứ đối nghịch như thế thì chỉ có thể là nhờ hấp lực của . đó không giống chút nào với những gì đã xảy ra trong một huy hoàng từng đến với nàng. Giờ đây vị lão tăng là một người ngoi lên từ đáy âm ty chứ không có dung nghi cao dày và quầng ánh sáng của Độ tỏa sáng sau lưng như nàng từng mơ. Cái ánh sáng cho Độ toát ra từ ấy nay mất dạng. Không thể nhầm lẫn được, đó vẫn là vị lão tăng nàng đã thấy bên bờ hồ Shiga, nhưng cớ sao, nay lại giống một người khác.
Cũng như tất cả những người sống trong cung cấm, hoàng phi Kyôgoku có khuynh hướng dè dặt đối với cả tình cảm của mình. Khi có cái gì lý ra làm cho mình , nàng vẫn giữ đó. Cho dầu nhìn rõ bằng chứng mối tình của vị lão tăng, một mối tình không gì cao cả hơn mà nàng đã tự thuở nào, hoàng phi chỉ vì không dè nó chỉ biểu hiện dưới dáng dấp quá đỗi tầm thường.
lê được kinh đô, vị chùa Shiga hầu như quên hết . Khi lén đến khu vườn gần nơi ngự sở của hoàng phi Kyôgoku và nghĩ rằng người đàn bà có lẽ đang ở phía sau rèm, cụ như người vừa từ những cơn .
Bây giờ, khi tình yêu của cụ , kiếp bắt đầu cụ . Vị lão tăng có cụ tưởng tượng Độ có thể mang một hình thái như thế này. Sự mong ngóng được về Độ ai ngờ cũng giống như tình yêu nhục cảm. Giờ đây, cụ chỉ còn cần làm một sau cùng là đến gặp bà phi để tình yêu của mình thì đủ xóa sạch được những của kiếp bấy lâu gây không cho cụ những kiếp . Chỉ cần có bấy nhiêu thôi!
Khom tấm thân già trên để đứng cho vững, đối với cụ bây giờ cũng là chuyện . chói chang của một ngày tháng năm xen qua kẽ lá đổ xuống đỉnh đầu. Cụ thấy choáng váng, bao nhiêu lần phải bám chặt lấy cây gậy. Nếu bà phi sớm điều đó và mời cụ vào thì có thể sẽ chóng vánh. Và lúc đó, cánh cửa của Độ sẽ mở ra chờ đón cụ. Vị lão tăng mỗi điều ấy. Cụ mệt lả nhưng vẫn ráng tựa vào cây gậy mà chờ. Mãi đến khi trời đã về chiều. Thế rồi bóng tối dâng lên. Dù vậy vẫn chưa có tín hiệu gì từ phía bà phi.
hoàng phi làm thế nào biết được vị lão tăng đã nhìn thấy Độ đằng sau của nàng và thông qua nàng. Nàng nhìn về mảnh sân đằng trước bức rèm. già vẫn đó. chiều xế xuống sân. Cụ hãy .
Hoàng phi bỗng . Bà ngỡ người đứng mình chính là hồn oan của những mà nhiều lần nhắc tới. Bà nỗi bị đọa dâng lên trong người. Làm cho vị như thế vướng vào mối thì Độ sẽ không bao giờ nàng. Chỉ có với những khủng khiếp của nó thường ngày vẫn nghe nói sẽ đến với nàng thôi. Lúc này thì của tình yêu mà nàng đã bị phá vỡ. Được người khác yêu như của nàng chỉ là chịu sự trong . Khác hẳn về nàng mà vị lão tăng nhìn thấy, cái mà nàng thấy chỉ là sự khủng khiếp của già.
Thế nhưng là kiêu hãnh, bà dễ dàng gì để cho nỗi đó khuất phục. , già có đến lúc ngã quị thì đã sao! Khi ra ngoài qua tấm rèm và thấy đã ngã gục vẫn còn trơ ra đó, bà không khỏi .
Màn đêm rơi xuống. Thêm có ánh trăng dọi vào, dáng gầy guộc của đang trông chẳng khác nào một bộ .
Hoàng phi Kyôgoku đến nỗi không tài nào nhắm mắt. Chẳng thèm nhìn ra ngoài rèm nữa, nàng quay lưng lại hướng ấy. nàng vẫn tia nhìn của vị sư già. Ôi thôi, mối tình này không phải là một mối tình tầm thường. Thế nhưng sự được yêu và sự phải bị đọa , ngược lại đã làm cho bà tập trung được khấn nguyện để được thác sinh vào Độ. Đó là Độ mà bà ấp ủ trong lòng và cho nó không bị . Độ của bà không giống cái Độ của vị vì nó không gì đến mối tình của cụ đối với nàng. Nàng nghĩ rằng nếu như mình gọi , cái cõi Tinh Độ nàng đang khấn nguyện tìm về sẽ bị sụp đổ tan tành.
Nàng tự nhủ tình yêu một chiều của vị đâu có gì đến mình. Cụ ta tự ý yêu như thế mặc cụ. Đâu có chút nào được đi về Độ của mình!
Dù như vậy, khi đêm càng khuya và trời càng thấm lạnh thì bà phi cũng mất dần tự tin. thôi, bà còn nghĩ nếu già có , ngã lăn ra chết, bà cũng chẳng .
Vị vẫn đứng như thế trong vườn. Khi ánh trăng lẩn khuất, bóng của cụ kỳ quái như một ngọn cây khô quắt.
” Không, không, ta với cái bóng kia không gì hết!”. Bà phi gào lên trong lòng. Cơ sự xảy ra vượt ra ngoài tầm của nàng. Có thể là điều hiếm có nhưng trong một thoáng như thế này, bà phi quên quấy mình là một mỹ nhân. Bảo rằng lúc đó bà quên đi thì có vẻ đúng hơn.
, bầu trời xen một vài vệt trắng. Trong cái của buổi hừng đông, vị lão tăng vẫn còn đứng nguyên đấy.
Hoàng phi thua cuộc. Bà đành gọi thị nữ ra ngoài vườn mời đến trước rèm.
Vị lão tăng đã mức ngã, không biết xác thịt mình hãy còn hay đã . Cụ hết nổi kẻ đang chờ đợi mình là bà hoàng phi hay là kiếp . Khi bóng người thị nữ khu vườn nửa sáng nửa tối để đến kề bên, cụ cũng không ra được những gì sẽ xảy ra tiếp đó.
Thị nữ truyền lại của hoàng phi. Lão tăng bằng một giống như tiếng kêu , không phải tiếng người.
Phía trong bức rèm chỗ bà phi ngồi tối đen, người từ bên ngoài không thể nhìn được của bà.Vị lão tăng quì xuống trước bà, hai tay bưng mặt khóc.
Cụ khóc một hồi lâu, không có lấy một lời. Khóc và chỉ biết khóc, tưởng như tiếng khóc sẽ không bao giờ dứt.
Trong lúc đó, bên dưới bức rèm và từ trong chỗ bóng tối , một bàn tay trắng muốt như tuyết đang chìa ra phía ngoài.
Vị chùa Shiga đưa hai tay ra đón nhận và ấp ủ bàn tay của người mình . Cụ áp bàn tay đó lên trán mình, rồi lên má.
Hoàng phi Kyôgoku cảm được cái lạnh từ bàn tay đang chạm đến tay mình. Sau một lúc, bàn tay đó bỗng nóng lên rồi ướt đẫm. Bà không chút khi bàn tay của mình đang thấm ướt nước mắt của ai đó.
Thế nhưng bầu trời đã trắng bạch và khi hoàng phi ánh sáng bắt đầu len vào sau rèm, trong lòng người đàn bà có con tim này bỗng nhiên một linh cảm lạ lùng từ đâu đến xâm chiếm: không còn , cái bàn tay không đã ấp ủ tay ta bên kia tấm rèm chỉ có thể là bàn tay của chính .
Một như sống dậy trong lòng hoàng phi. Đó là khung cảnh Độ với nền bằng , với lâu đài cung điện bằng , với những vị đang tấu nhạc, với những khu hồ trải cát có muôn nghìn đóa lấp lánh ánh sáng, với lũ chim gia-lăng-tần-la ríu ra ríu rít… tất cả đều như vừa được . Nếu trên đó là của Độ mà hoàng phi tin rằng mình sẽ thì kể từ nay, nàng có thể tình yêu của vị lão tăng. Hoàng phi chỉ còn đợi người đàn ông có bàn tay của gọi: “Hãy vén rèm lên!” mà thôi. Vị lão tăng có thể nàng điều đó. Có thể nàng sẽ vén rèm cho cụ. Cũng như trong buổi gặp gỡ bên bờ hồ Shiga, có thể hoàng phi Kyôgoku sẽ già được nhìn thấy khuôn mặt của nàng. Và nàng cũng có thể mời cụ bước vào bên trong nữa…
Hoàng phi Kyôgoku chờ đợi.
Thế nhưng vị lão tăng chùa Shiga không thốt lên lấy một lời. Cụ không điều gì cả. Bàn tay đang lấy bàn tay của người đẹp rồi cũng buông ra. Cụ để bàn tay trắng muốt như tuyết đó trong ánh sáng của buổi bình minh.
Vị đi khuất. Hoàng phi tim mình buốt giá.
Vài ngày sau, có tin đưa đến là vị đã trong của người. Từ đó, hoàng phi Kyôgoku bắt đầu ngồi chép những trang kinh để tiến cúng nhà chùa. Đó là , , , toàn những quí hiếm.
(Dịch xong tại Tokyo, ngày 17/09/2007.)
Aury, Dominique, 1983, Le prêtre du temple de Shiga et son amour (dịch
Mishima theo The Priest and His Love), trong Yukio, Mishima, La Mort en
Eté, Gallimard, Paris.
2) Mishima, Yukio, 1978, Shigadera shônin no koi, trong Mishima Yukio, Misaki nite no Monogatari, Shinchô Bunko, Tôkyô.
3) Morris, Ivan, 1962, The Priest and His Love (dịch Shigadera shônin no koi), trong Morris, Ivan chủ biên, Modern Japanese Stories, An Anthology, Charles Tuttle Co, Tokyo, bản in lần thứ 23, 1997.
Taiheiki, tiểu thuyết
ghi lại giai đoạn
biến loạn vào thời trung cổ . Gồm 40
quyển, tương truyền do một , Kojima Hôshi viết. khoảng 1368-75 hay 1375-79.
- Ikkaku Sennin ( ), còn gọi là Ikkasen ( Tiên) hay Dokkakusen ( Tiên), người được là một của . Người nước Nại bên , vốn do nai sinh ra trong rừng, đầu có một sừng. định lâu năm nên có . Vì nhà vua nên vị này làm cho trời hạn hán. Sau bị một do nhà vua gữi đến làm mất phép . Từ đấy mưa lại chan hòa. này đã thành đề tài của tuồng Nô của Konparu Zenchiku (1405- khoảng 1470).
- Còn gọi là Suufukuji ( ) một ngôi chùa cổ xây từ năm 668 bên cạnh kinh đô khi đó còn là Nara. Một trong mười ngôi chùa lớn đương thời nhưng nay không còn .
- trung cổ dài khoảng 400 năm.
- cho rằng có tĩnh thiên biến vạn hóa ở , nơi có Phật và chư Phật. nếu có thể về đấy. Bắt đầu ở , sau một phái ở Nhật với là tăng Hônen ( , 1133-1212).
- Ôjô Yôshuu, sách nhà Phật, 3 quyển do tăng Genshin ( , 942-1017) trứ tác, năm 986, khuyên người để được .
- Hay Eshin Sôzu, tên để gọi tăng Genshin, phái Tendai ( ), từng du học bên .
- Cữu ngưu , chữ của trong bức thư gữi cho bạn là Nhiệm Thiếu Khanh.”Phản lệnh bộc ,nhược cữu ngưu vong nhất mao”. Ý nói là “một chuyện nhỏ không thấm vào đâu”.
- . Còn gọi là .
- Theo âm Kalavinka, thú đầu người mình chim, có giọng hát ngọt ngào, ở trên đỉnh hay cõi .
- Theo âm Yojana, đo lường thời cổ . Một Yojana rộng đến 7 đến 9 dặm Anh.
- Tức (Shumisen) do chữ Phạn Sumeru là đỉnh núi ở của nhà Phật, có và cai trị, vây bởi bát sơn . , và các ngôi sao lại quay vòng bên ngoài.
- Tưởng, chữ nhà Phật để chỉ sự tập trung để về dòng nước trong trên Độ. Đây là thứ 2 trong số 16 phép ( ) được giảng trong .
- Kinh Cực, tên một khu vực và cung điện trong thành Kyôto. Thường quyền thần và ngoại thích Fujiwara no Michinaga, có nhiều con gái gả cho các .
- Trượng có hình đầu chim (câu trượng) để mừng người trên 80 tuổi vì là giống chim ăn không bị hóc.
Yukio (bút hiệu của Hiraoka Kimitake, 1925-1970) là một trong những
đương đại . Năm 1947, ông tốt
nghiệp phân khoa Luật tại Ðại học Tokyo, rồi sau đó mình cho một
và đa dạng: tiểu luận, sân khấu, tiểu thuyết, truyện ngắn,
du ký... Ông đã được ba giải lớn của Nhật. Truyện
ngắn "Ưu Quốc" (Yukoku) dưới đây mở đầu có nhắc tới
ngày 26 tháng 2, một ngày máu đã đổ trên đất nhưng
bản tiếng chú dẫn. Văn hữu Nguyễn Nam Trân (Tokyo)
đã giữa Ưu Quốc với ngày
này như sau:
26 tháng 2 là cuộc đảo chánh năm Chiêu Hòa 11 (1936) của một nhóm sĩ quan lục quân trẻ tuổi phái bảo hoàng nhằm lật đổ chính phủ (theo họ là một chính quyền , làm kinh tế , gây nạn đói), để lập một nội các mới. Nhóm sĩ quan này dẫn khoảng 1400 phần lớn là tân binh đi vây các và giết chết năm Bộ trưởng phái dân sự, nhưng lại để thoát được. Tuy họ , đòi ông ra thân chính, song Chiêu Hòa (Showa hay Hirohito) lại nhận phiến loạn, đã các đại thần do mình nên ra lệnh cho hải quân . Ðiều này đưa đến là một số quân nhân phái bảo hoàng được lệnh nổ súng vào những người chí hương. Sau đó, loạn quân đã phải doanh trại, và các sĩ quan cầm đầu bị hành quyết ngay giữa Tokyo. Tuy thất bại kỳ đó, nhưng sau này quân phiệt càng ngày càng mạnh, dần dà họ nắm trọn chính quyền với tướng Tojo Hideki (Ðông Ðiều Anh Cơ), và nhảy vào đại chiến thứ hai.
Mishima rất ngưỡng mộ của cuộc binh biến ngày 26-2 này, mà ông cho là "biểu tượng của tình yêu nước , không vụ lợi ". Năm 1970, ông cùng 30-40 người đồng chí trong Câu lạc bộ Cái Khiên (Tate No Kai, Club of Shield, một binh đội tư nhân do ông ) đã gây một vụ "đảo chính" ngay doanh trại Bộ Quốc phòng Nhật, nhưng không ai theo mà còn , nên đã mổ bụng , lúc đó mới 45 tuổi. Truyện ngắn này đã được dựng thành một cuốn phim ngắn, rất , do Mishima đóng vai chính.
Xin cám ơn văn hữu Nguyễn Nam Trân đã đọc lại bản dịch so với bản gốc Nhật ngữ. Bản tiếng Pháp dịch từ Anh ngữ, vài chỗ khá tối nghĩa và không lột tả được những nét đặc thù rất Nhật. Nguồn: http://vnthuquan.net/truyen/truyen.a...3237nvn&cochu=
Priest of Shiga Temple and His Love
by Yukio Mishima, translated by Ivan Morris
ACCORDING TO ESHIN’S “Essentials of Salvation,” the Ten Pleasures are but a drop in the ocean when compared to the joys of the Pure Land. In that Land the earth is made of emerald and the roads that lead across it are lined by cordons of gold rope. The surface is endlessly level and there are no boundaries. Within each of the sacred Precincts are fifty thousand million halls and towers wrought of gold, silver, lapis lazuli, crystal, coral, agate, and pearls; and wondrous garments are spread out on all the jeweled daises. Within the halls and above the towers a multitude of angels are forever playing sacred music and singing paeans of praise to the Tathagata Buddha. In the gardens that surround the halls and the towers and the cloisters are great gold and emerald ponds where the faithful may perform their ablutions; and the gold ponds are lined with silver sand, and the emerald ponds are lined with crystal sand. The ponds are covered with lotus plants which sparkle in variegated colors and, as the breeze wafts over the surface of the water, magnificent lights crisscross in all directions. Both day and night the air is filled with the songs of cranes, geese, mandarin ducks, peacocks, parrots, and sweet-voiced Kalavinkas, who have the faces of beautiful women. All these and the myriad other hundred-jeweled birds are raising their melodious voices in praise of the Buddha. (However sweet their voices may sound, so immense a collection of birds must be extremely noisy.)
The borders of the ponds and the banks of the rivers are lined with groves of sacred treasure trees. These trees have golden stems and silver branches and coral blossoms, and their beauty is mirrored in the waters. The air is full of jeweled cords, and from these cords hang the myriad treasure bells which forever ring out the Supreme Law of Buddha; and strange musical instruments, which play by themselves without ever being touched, also stretch far into the pellucid sky.
If one feels like having something to eat, there automatically appears before one’s eyes a seven-jeweled table on whose shining surface rest seven-jeweled bowls heaped high with the choicest delicacies. But there is no need to pick up these viands and put them in one’s mouth. All that is necessary is to look at their inviting colors and to enjoy their aroma: thereby the stomach is filled and the body nourished, while one remains oneself spiritually and physically pure. When one has thus finished one’s meal without any eating, the bowls and the table are instantly wafted off.
Likewise, one’s body is automatically arrayed in clothes, without any need for sewing, laundering, dyeing, or repairing.
Lamps, too, are unnecessary, for the sky is illumined by an omnipresent light. Furthermore, the Pure Land enjoys a moderate temperature all year round, so that neither heating nor cooling is required. A hundred thousand subtle scents perfume the air and lotus petals rain down constantly.
In the chapter of the Inspection Gate we are told that, since uninitiated sightseers cannot hope to penetrate deep into the Pure Land, they must concentrate, first, on awakening their powers of “external imagination” and, thereafter, on steadily expanding these powers. Imaginative power can provide a short cut for escaping from the trammels of our mundane life and for seeing the Buddha. If we are endowed with a rich, turbulent imagination, we can focus our attention on a single lotus flower and from there can spread out to infinite horizons.
By means of microscopic observation and astronomical projection the lotus flower can become the foundation for an entire theory of the universe and an agent whereby we may perceive the Truth. And first we must know that each of the petals has eighty-four thousand veins and that each vein gives off eighty-four thousand lights. Furthermore, the smallest of these flowers has a diameter of two hundred and fifty yojana. Thus, assuming that the yojana of which we read in the Holy Writings correspond to seventy-five miles each, we may conclude that a lotus flower with a diameter of nineteen thousand miles is on the small side.
Now such a flower has eighty-four thousand petals and between each of the petals there are one million jewels, each emitting one thousand lights. Above the beautifully adorned calyx of the flower rise four bejeweled pillars and each of these pillars is one hundred billion times as great as Mount Sumeru, which towers in the center of the Buddhist universe. From the pillars hang great draperies and each drapery is adorned with fifty thousand million jewels, and each jewel emits eighty-four thousand lights, and each light is composed of eighty-four thousand different golden colors, and each of these golden colors in its turn is variously transmogrified.
To concentrate on such images is known as “thinking of the Lotus Seat on which Lord Buddha sits”; and the conceptual world that hovers in the background of our story is a world imagined on such a scale.
THE GREAT PRIEST of Shiga Temple was a man of the most eminent virtue. His eyebrows were white, and it was as much as he could do to move his old bones along as he hobbled on his stick from one part of the temple to another.
In the eyes of this learned ascetic the world was a mere pile of rubbish. He had lived away from it for many a long year and the little pine sapling that he had planted with his own hands on moving into his present cell had grown into a great tree whose branches swelled in the wind. A monk who had succeeded in abandoning the Floating World for so long a time must feel secure about his future.
When the Great Priest saw the rich and the noble, he smiled with compassion and wondered how it was that these people did not recognize their pleasures for the empty dreams that they were. When he noticed beautiful women, his only reaction was to be moved with pity for men who still inhabited the world of delusion and who were tossed about on the waves of carnal pleasure.
From the moment that a man no longer responds in the slightest to the motives that regulate the material world, that world appears to be at complete repose. In the eyes of the Great Priest the world showed only repose; it had become a mere picture on a piece of paper, a map of some foreign land. When one has attained a state of mind from which the evil passions of the present world have been so utterly winnowed, fear too is forgotten. Thus it was that the priest no longer could understand why Hell should exist. He knew beyond all peradventure that the present world no longer had any power left over him; but, as he was completely devoid of conceit, it did not occur to him that this was the effect of his own eminent virtue.
So far as his body was concerned, one might say that the priest had well-nigh been deserted by his own flesh. On such occasions as he observed it—when taking a bath, for instance—he would rejoice to see how his protruding bones were precariously covered by his withered skin. Now that his body had reached this stage, he felt that he could come to terms with it, as if it belonged to someone else. Such a body, it seemed, was already more suited for the nourishment of the Pure Land than for terrestrial food and drink.
In his dreams he lived nightly in the Pure Land, and when he awoke he knew that to subsist in the present world was to be tied to a sad and evanescent dream.
In the flower-viewing season large numbers of people came from the Capital to visit the village of Shiga. This did not trouble the priest in the slightest, for he had long since transcended that state in which the clamors of the world can irritate the mind. One spring evening he left his cell, leaning on his stick, and walked down to the lake. It was the hour when dusky shadows slowly begin to thrust their way into the bright light of the afternoon. There was not the slightest ripple to disturb the surface of the water. The priest stood by himself at the edge of the lake and began to perform the holy rite of Water Contemplation.
At that moment an ox-drawn carriage, clearly belonging to a person of high rank, came around the lake and stopped close to where the priest was standing. The owner was a Court lady from the Kyogoku district of the Capital who held the exalted title of Great Imperial Concubine. This lady had come to view the springtime scenery in Shiga and now on her return she had stopped the carriage and raised the blind in order to have a final look at the lake.
Unwittingly the Great Priest glanced in her direction and at once he was overwhelmed by her beauty. His eyes met hers and, as he did nothing to avert his gaze, she did not take it upon herself to turn away. It was not that her liberality of spirit was such as to allow men to gaze on her with brazen looks; but the motives of this austere old ascetic could hardly, she felt, be those of ordinary men.
After a few moments the lady pulled down the blind. Her carriage started to move and, having gone through the Shiga Pass, rolled slowly down the road that led to the Capital. Night fell and the carriage made its way toward the city along the Road of the Silver Temple. Until the carriage had become a pinprick that disappeared between the distant trees, the Great Priest stood rooted to the spot.
In the twinkling of an eye the present world had wreaked its revenge on the priest with terrible force. What he had imagined to be completely safe had collapsed in ruins.
He returned to the temple, faced the Main Image of Buddha, and invoked the Sacred Name. But impure thoughts now cast their opaque shadows about him. A woman’s beauty, he told himself, was but a fleeting apparition, a temporary phenomenon composed of flesh—of flesh that was soon to be destroyed. Yet, try as he might to ward it off, the ineffable beauty which had overpowered him at that instant by the lake now pressed on his heart with the force of something that has come from an infinite distance. The Great Priest was not young enough, either spiritually or physically, to believe that this new feeling was simply a trick that his flesh had played on him. A man’s flesh, he knew full well, could not alter so rapidly. Rather, he seemed to have been immersed in some swift, subtle poison which had abruptly transmuted his spirit.
THE GREAT PRIEST had never broken his vow of chastity. The inner fight that he had waged in his youth against the demands of the flesh had made him think of women as mere carnal beings. The only real flesh was the flesh that existed in his imagination. Since, therefore, he regarded the flesh as an ideal abstraction, rather than as a physical fact, he had relied on his spiritual strength to subjugate it. In this effort the priest had achieved success—success, indeed, that no one who knew him could possibly doubt.
Yet the face of the woman who had raised the carriage blind and gazed across the lake was too harmonious, too refulgent, to be designated as a mere object of flesh, and the priest did not know what name to give it. He could only think that, in order to bring about that wondrous moment, something which had for a long time lurked deceptively within him had finally revealed itself. That thing was nothing other than the present world, which until then had been at repose, but which had now suddenly lifted itself out of the darkness and begun to stir.
It was as if he had been standing by the highway that led to the Capital, with his hands firmly covering both ears, and had watched two great oxcarts rumble past each other. All of a sudden he had removed his hands and the noise from outside had surged all about him.
To perceive the ebb and flow of passing phenomena, to have their noise roaring in one’s ears, was to enter into the circle of the present world. For a man like the Great Priest, who had severed his relations with all outside things, it was to place himself once again into a state of relationship.
Even as he read the Sutras he would time after time hear himself heaving great sighs of anguish. Perhaps nature, he thought, might serve to distract his spirits, and he gazed out of the window of his cell at the mountains that towered in the distance under the evening sky. Yet his thoughts, instead of concentrating on the beauty, broke up like tufts of cloud and drifted away. He fixed his gaze on the moon, but his thoughts continued to wander as before; and when once again he went and stood before the Main Image in a desperate effort to regain his purity of mind, the countenance of the Buddha was transformed and looked like the face of the lady in the carriage. His universe had been imprisoned within the confines of a small circle: at one point was the Great Priest and opposite was the Great Imperial Concubine.
THE GREAT IMPERIAL Concubine of Kyogoku had soon forgotten about the old priest whom she had noticed gazing so intently at her by the lake at Shiga. After some time, however, a rumor came to her ears and she was reminded of the incident. One of the villagers happened to have caught sight of the Great Priest as he had stood watching the lady’s carriage disappear into the distance. He had mentioned the matter to a Court gentleman who had come to Shiga for flower-viewing and had added that since that day the priest had behaved like one crazed.
The Imperial Concubine pretended to disbelieve the rumor. The virtue of this particular priest, however, was noted throughout the Capital, and the incident was bound to feed the lady’s vanity.
For she was utterly weary of the love that she received from the men of this world. The Imperial Concubine was fully aware of her own beauty, and she tended to be attracted by any force, such as religion, that treated her beauty and her high rank as things of no value. Being exceedingly bored with the present world, she believed in the Pure Land. It was inevitable that Jodo Buddhism, which rejected all the beauty and brilliance of the visual world as being mere filth and defilement, should have a particular appeal for someone like the Imperial Concubine who was thoroughly disillusioned with the superficial elegance of Court life—an elegance that seemed unmistakably to bespeak the Latter Days of the Law and their degeneracy.
Among those whose special interest was love, the Great Imperial Concubine was held in honor as the very personification of Courtly refinement. The fact that she was known never to have given her love to any man added to this reputation. Though she performed her duties toward the Emperor with the most perfect decorum, no one for a moment believed that she loved him from her heart. The Great Imperial Concubine dreamt of a passion that lay on the boundary of the impossible.
The Great Priest of Shiga Temple was famous for his virtue, and everyone in the Capital knew how this aged prelate had totally abandoned the present world. All the more startling, then, was the rumor that he had been dazzled by the charms of the Imperial Concubine and that for her sake he had sacrificed the future world. To give up the joys of the Pure Land which were so close at hand—there could be no greater sacrifice than this, no greater gift.
The Great Imperial Concubine was utterly indifferent to the charms of the young rakes who flocked about the Court and of the handsome noblemen who came her way. The physical attributes of men no longer meant anything to her. Her only concern was to find a man who could give her the strongest and deepest possible love. A woman with such aspirations is a truly terrifying creature. If she is a mere courtesan, she will no doubt be satisfied with worldly wealth. The Great Imperial Concubine, however, already enjoyed all those things that the wealth of the world can provide. The man whom she awaited must offer her the wealth of the future world. The rumors of the Great Priest’s infatuation spread throughout the Court. In the end the story was even told half jokingly to the Emperor himself. The Great Concubine took no pleasure in this bantering gossip and preserved a cool, indifferent mien. As she was well aware, there were two reasons why the people of the Court could joke freely about a matter which would normally have been forbidden: first, by referring to the Great Priest’s love they were paying a compliment to the beauty of the woman who could inspire even an ecclesiastic of such great virtue to forsake his meditations; secondly, everyone fully realized that the old man’s love for the noblewoman could never possibly be requited.
The Great Imperial Concubine called to mind the face of the old priest whom she had seen through her carriage window. It did not bear the remotest resemblance to the face of any of the men who had loved her until then. Strange it was that love should spring up in the heart of a man who did not have the slightest qualification for being loved. The lady recalled such phrases as “my love forlorn and without hope” that were widely used by poetasters in the Palace when they wished to awaken some sympathy in the hearts of their indifferent paramours. Compared to the hopeless situation in which the Great Priest now found himself, the state of the least fortunate of these elegant lovers was almost enviable, and their poetic tags struck her now as mere trappings of worldly alliance, inspired by vanity and utterly devoid of pathos.
At this point it will be clear to the reader that the Great Imperial Concubine was not, as was so widely believed, the personification of Courtly elegance, but, rather, a person who found the real relish of life in the knowledge of being loved. Despite her high rank, she was first of all a woman; and all the power and authority in the world seemed to her empty things if they were bereft of this knowledge. The men about her might devote themselves to struggles for political power; but she dreamt of subduing the world by different means, by purely feminine means. Many of the women whom she had known had taken the tonsure and retired from the world. Such women struck her as laughable. For, whatever a woman may say about abandoning the world, it is almost impossible for her to give up the things that she possesses. Only men are really capable of giving up what they possess.
That old priest by the lake had at a certain stage in his life given up the Floating World and all its pleasures. In the eyes of the Imperial Concubine he was far more of a man than all the nobles whom she knew at Court. And, just as he had once abandoned this present Floating World, so now on her behalf he was about to give up the future world as well.
The Imperial Concubine recalled the notion of the sacred lotus flower, which her own deep faith had vividly imprinted upon her mind. She thought of the huge lotus with its width of two hundred and fifty yojana. That preposterous plant was far more fitted to her tastes than those puny lotus flowers which floated on the ponds in the Capital. At night when she listened to the wind soughing through the trees in her garden, the sound seemed to her extremely insipid when compared to the delicate music in the Pure Land when the wind blew through the sacred treasure trees. When she thought of the strange instruments that hung in the sky and that played by themselves without ever being touched, the sound of the harp that echoed through the Palace halls seemed to her a paltry imitation.
THE GREAT PRIEST of Shiga Temple was fighting. In the fight that he had waged against the flesh in his youth he had always been buoyed up by the hope of inheriting the future world. But this desperate fight of his old age was linked with a sense of irreparable loss.
The impossibility of consummating his love for the Great Imperial Concubine was as clear to him as the sun in the sky. At the same time he was fully aware of the impossibility of advancing toward the Pure Land so long as he remained in the thralls of this love. The Great Priest, who had lived in an incomparably free state of mind, had in a twinkling been enclosed in darkness and the future was totally obscure. It may have been that the courage which had seen him through his youthful struggles had grown out of self-confidence and pride in the fact that he was voluntarily depriving himself of pleasure that could have been his for the asking.
The Great Priest was again possessed by fear. Until that noble carriage had approached the side of Lake Shiga, he had believed that what lay in wait for him, close at hand, was nothing less than the final release of Nirvana. But now he had awaked into the darkness of the present world, where it is impossible to see what lurks a single step ahead.
The various forms of religious meditation were all in vain. He tried the Contemplation of the Chrysanthemum, the Contemplation of the Total Aspect, and the Contemplation of the Parts; but each time that he started to concentrate, the beautiful visage of the Concubine appeared before his eyes. Water Contemplation, too, was useless, for invariably her lovely face would float up shimmering from beneath the ripples of the lake.
This, no doubt, was a natural consequence of his infatuation. Concentration, the priest soon realized, did more harm than good, and next he tried to dull his spirit by dispersal. It astonished him that spiritual concentration should have the paradoxical effect of leading him still deeper into his delusions; but he soon realized that to try the contrary method by dispersing his thoughts meant that he was, in effect, admitting these very delusions. As his spirit began to yield under the weight, the priest decided that, rather than pursue a futile struggle, it were better to escape from the effort of escaping by deliberately concentrating his thoughts on the figure of the Great Imperial Concubine.
The Great Priest found a new pleasure in adorning his vision of the lady in various ways, just as though he were adorning a Buddhist statue with diadems and baldachins. In so doing, he turned the object of his love into an increasingly resplendent, distant, impossible being; and this afforded him particular joy. But why? Surely it would be more natural for him to envisage the Great Imperial Concubine as an ordinary female, close at hand and possessing normal human frailties. Thus he could better turn her to advantage, at least in his imagination.
As he pondered this question, the truth dawned on him. What he was depicting in the Great Imperial Concubine was not a creature of flesh, nor was it a mere vision; rather, it was a symbol of reality, a symbol of the essence of things. It was strange, indeed, to pursue that essence in the figure of a woman. Yet the reason was not far to seek. Even when falling in love, the Great Priest of Shiga had not discarded the habit, to which he had trained himself during his long years of contemplation, of striving to approach the essence of things by means of constant abstraction. The Great Imperial Concubine of Kyogoku had now become uniform with his vision of the immense lotus of two hundred and fifty yojana. As she reclined on the water supported by all the lotus flowers, she had become vaster than Mount Sumeru, vaster than an entire realm.
The more the Great Priest turned his love into something impossible, the more deeply was he betraying the Buddha. For the impossibility of this love had become bound up with the impossibility of attaining enlightenment. The more he thought of his love as hopeless, the firmer grew the fantasy that supported it and the deeper-rooted became his impure thoughts. So long as he regarded his love as being even remotely feasible, it was paradoxically possible for him to resign himself; but now that the Great Concubine had grown into a fabulous and utterly unattainable creature the priest’s love became motionless like a great stagnant lake which firmly, obdurately, covers the earth’s surface.
He hoped that somehow he might see the lady’s face once more, yet he feared that when he met her, that figure, which had now become like a giant lotus, would crumble away without a trace. If that were to happen, he would without doubt be saved. Yes, this time he was bound to attain enlightenment. And the very prospect filled the Great Priest with fear and awe.
The priest’s lonely love had begun to devise strange, self-deceiving guiles, and when at length he reached the decision to go and see the lady, he was under the delusion that he had almost recovered from the illness that was searing his body. The bemused priest even mistook the joy that accompanied his decision for relief at having finally escaped from the trammels of his love.
NONE OF THE GREAT Concubine’s people found anything especially strange in the sight of an old priest standing silently in the corner of the garden, leaning on a stick and gazing somberly at the residence. Ascetics and beggars frequently stood outside the great houses of the Capital and waited for alms. One of the ladies in attendance mentioned the matter to her mistress. The Great Imperial Concubine casually glanced through the blind that separated her from the garden. There in the shadow of the fresh green foliage stood a withered old priest with faded black robes and bowed head. For some time the lady looked at him. When she realized that this was without any question the priest whom she had seen by the lake at Shiga, her pale face turned paler still.
After a few moments of indecision, she gave orders that the priest’s presence in her garden should be ignored. Her attendants bowed and withdrew.
Now for the first time the lady fell prey to uneasiness. In her lifetime she had seen many people who had abandoned the world, but never before had she laid eyes on someone who had abandoned the future world. The sight was ominous and inexpressibly fearful. All the pleasure that her imagination had conjured up from the idea of the priest’s love disappeared in a flash. Much as he might have surrendered the future world on her behalf, that world, she now realized, would never pass into her own hands.
The Great Imperial Concubine looked down at her elegant clothes and at her beautiful hands, and then she looked across the garden at the uncomely features of the old priest and at his shabby robes. There was a horrible fascination in the fact that a connection should exist between them.
How different it all was from the splendid vision! The Great Priest seemed now like a person who had hobbled out of Hell itself. Nothing remained of that man of virtuous presence who had trailed the brightness of the Pure Land behind him. The brilliance which had resided within him and which had called to mind the glory of the Pure Land had vanished utterly. Though this was certainly the man who had stood by the Shiga Lake, it was at the same time a totally different person.
Like most people of the Court, the Great Imperial Concubine tended to be on her guard against her own emotions, especially when she was confronted with something that could be expected to affect her deeply. Now on seeing this evidence of the Great Priest’s love, she felt disheartened at the thought that the consummate passion of which she had dreamt during all these years should assume so colorless a form.
When the priest had finally limped into the Capital leaning on his stick, he had almost forgotten his exhaustion. Secretly he made his way into the grounds of the Great Imperial Concubine’s residence at Kyogoku and looked across the garden. Behind those blinds, he thought, was sitting none other than the lady whom he loved.
Now that his adoration had assumed an immaculate form, the future world once again began to exert its charm on the Great Priest. Never before had he envisaged the Pure Land in so immaculate, so poignant, an aspect. His yearning for it became almost sensual. Nothing remained for him but the formality of meeting the Great Concubine, of declaring his love, and of thus ridding himself once and for all of the impure thoughts that tied him to this world and that still prevented him from attaining the Pure Land. That was all that remained to be done.
It was painful for him to stand there supporting his old body on his stick. The bright rays of the May sun poured through the leaves and beat down on his shaven head. Time after time he felt himself losing consciousness and without his stick he would certainly have collapsed. If only the lady would realize the situation and invite him into her presence, so that the formality might be done with! The Great Priest waited. He waited and supported his ever-growing weariness on his stick. At length the sun was covered with the evening clouds. Dusk gathered. Yet still no word came from the Great Imperial Concubine.
She, of course, had no way of knowing that the priest was looking through her, beyond her, into the Pure Land. Time after time she glanced out through the blinds. He was standing there immobile. The evening light thrust its way into the garden. Still he continued standing there.
The Great Imperial Concubine became frightened. She felt that what she saw in the garden was an incarnation of that “deep-rooted delusion” of which she had read in the Sutras. She was overcome by the fear of tumbling into Hell. Now that she had led astray a priest of such high virtue, it was not the Pure Land to which she could look forward, but Hell itself, whose terrors she and those about her knew in such detail. The supreme love of which she had dreamt had already been shattered. To be loved as she was—that in itself represented damnation. Whereas the Great Priest looked beyond her into the Pure Land, she now looked beyond the priest into the horrid realms of Hell.
Yet this haughty noblewoman of Kyogoku was too proud to succumb to her fears without a fight, and she now summoned forth all the resources of her inbred ruthlessness. The Great Priest, she told herself, was bound to collapse sooner or later. She looked through the blind, thinking that by now he must be lying on the ground. To her annoyance, the silent figure stood there motionless.
Night fell and in the moonlight the figure of the priest looked like a pile of chalk-white bones.
The lady could not sleep for fear. She no longer looked through the blind and she turned her back to the garden. Yet all the time she seemed to feel the piercing gaze of the Great Priest on her back.
This, she knew, was no commonplace love. From fear of being loved, from fear of falling into Hell, the Great Imperial Concubine prayed more earnestly than ever for the Pure Land. It was for her own private Pure Land that she prayed—a Pure Land which she tried to preserve invulnerable within her heart. This was a different Pure Land from the priest’s and it had no connection with his love. She felt sure that if she were ever to mention it to him it would instantly disintegrate.
The priest’s love, she told herself, had nothing to do with her. It was a one-sided affair, in which her own feelings had no part, and there was no reason that it should disqualify her from being received into her Pure Land. Even if the Great Priest were to collapse and die, she would remain unscathed. Yet, as the night advanced and the air became colder, this confidence began to desert her.
The priest remained standing in the garden. When the moon was hidden by the clouds, he looked like a strange, gnarled old tree.
That form out there has nothing to do with me, thought the lady, almost beside herself with anguish, and the words seemed to boom within her heart. Why in Heaven’s name should this have happened?
At that moment, strangely, the Great Imperial Concubine completely forgot about her own beauty. Or perhaps it would be more correct to say that she had made herself forget it.
Finally, faint traces of white began to break through the dark sky and the priest’s figure emerged in the dawn twilight. He was still standing. The Great Imperial Concubine had been defeated. She summoned a maid and told her to invite the priest to come in from the garden and to kneel outside her blind.
The Great Priest was at the very boundary of oblivion when the flesh is on the verge of crumbling away. He no longer knew whether it was for the Great Imperial Concubine that he was waiting or for the future world. Though he saw the figure of the maid approaching from the residence into the dusky garden, it did not occur to him that what he had been awaiting was finally at hand.
The maid delivered her mistress’s message. When she had finished, the priest uttered a dreadful, almost inhuman cry. The maid tried to lead him by the hand, but he pulled away and walked by himself toward the house with fantastically swift, firm steps.
It was dark on the other side of the blind and from outside it was impossible to see the lady’s form. The priest knelt down and, covering his face with his hands, he wept. For a long time he stayed there without a word and his body shook convulsively.
Then in the dawn darkness a white hand gently emerged from behind the lowered blind. The priest of the Shiga Temple took it in his own hands and pressed it to his forehead and cheek.
The Great Imperial Concubine of Kyogoku felt a strange cold hand touching her hand. At the same time she was aware of a warm moisture. Her hand was being bedewed by someone else’s tears. Yet when the pallid shafts of morning light began to reach her through the blind, the lady’s fervent faith imbued her with a wonderful inspiration: she became convinced that the unknown hand which touched hers belonged to none other than the Buddha.
Then the great vision sprang up anew in the lady’s heart: the emerald earth of the Pure Land, the millions of seven-jeweled towers, the angels playing music, the golden ponds strewn with silver sand, the resplendent lotus, and the sweet voices of the Kalavinkas—all this was born afresh. If this was the Pure Land that she was to inherit—and so she now believed—why should she not accept the Great Priest’s love?
She waited for the man with the hands of Buddha to ask her to raise the blind that separated her from him. Presently he would ask her; and then she would remove the barrier and her incomparably beautiful body would appear before him as it had on that day by the edge of the lake at Shiga; and she would invite him to come in.
The Great Imperial Concubine waited.
But the priest of Shiga Temple did not utter a word. He asked her for nothing. After a while his old hands relaxed their grip and the lady’s snow-white hand was left alone in the dawn light. The priest departed. The heart of the Great Imperial Concubine turned cold.A few days later a rumor reached the Court that the Great Priest’s spirit had achieved its final liberation in his cell at Shiga. At this news the lady of Kyogoku set to copying the Sutras in roll after roll of beautiful writing.